That Shit’s Hilarious / This Shit is REAL presents the following real life children’s book available at fine booksellers and retailers everywhere:

Yes, the title of this children’s picture book is “Guns: What You Should Know”.

Now since this is a children’s book, we would hope that the answer to this statement is “NOTHING… children should know nothing about guns”.

But how quickly we at the Museum forget that this isn’t a place of morals or ethics were talking about… this is America/Amurrika.
And thus, this book proudly serves as a child’s adorable introduction to the types of guns out there and how they’re used.  Welp.

See below for the first 4 pages of the book.  And if you like what you see, go ahead and buy the book over at Amazon.com, where one reviewer happily writes:

“I like the fact that this book is non-judgemental regarding guns. It states the facts of the situation clearly and succinctly. My eight year old son had no trouble reading it and understanding the content of the text. Use of words and examples is good. I appreciate the fact that guns were not referred to as weapons.”

Mom, I hate it here.

Text reads:
Most children play with toy guns or use their hands to pretend they are holding a gun.  In the summertime, maybe you cool off by shooting water guns with a friend.  Have you ever wondered about real guns?

Text reads:
Rifles and shotguns are two of the many kinds of guns.  These long guns are called shoulder arms because they are held up to the shoulder when firing.  
Pistols and revolvers are shorter than shoulder arms.  They are called handguns because they can be held and fired with one or both hands.

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Coming soon for kids all over the country: “Post-9/11 American Democracy Wars: What You Should Know”, a fun picture book informing kids of all ages about the different ways America is spreading democracy every day and how they can someday get involved too via the Jeb Bush administration.