Coming soon to the Artifacts of Modernity Clothing Line: the iPad Display Case Shirt.
Now you can officially be the Teletubby you’ve always dreamed of being…
We look forward to the day when people start walking around the streets with ArtofMod.com prominently displayed on their chests.
thedailywhat has more on this masterful fashion breakthrough:
Things That Are All Too Real of the Day: On first look, the iPad Style Shirt appears to be not a single lick more than a regular heavyweight cotton tee with a dinky vinyl-screened pocket on the front intended for the completely unnecessary practice of intrusively broadcasting the contents of your iPad to the world. But wait!:
- “2 hidden port holes on the inside for headphones or charger.” (i.e. holes).
- “Internal supports distribute weight of iPad across the body to prevent shirt distortion.” (LOLWUT.)
- “Full mobility whether you are sitting down or walking.” (This was not at all a given!)
All this and so much less for only $50. May God have mercy on our souls.
This redefines the societal concept of what constitutes “horrible” / “cruel”.
On behalf of all humans everywhere, we’d like to apologize to each and every alpaca deeply offended by this.
A Whole New Way to Keep Kids Safe… (FML)
Dear 2010, I hate it here. See below:
Condoms in ‘extra small’ for boys age 12 set for Britain’s shelves soon
(taken from The Daily Mail, UK)
Extra small condoms for boys as young as 12 could soon be on our shelves.
The Hotshot condoms are going on sale in Switzerland after research found that not enough 12 to 14-year-old boys were having protected sex.
The condoms are likely to end up on sale in Britain, said their manufacturer Lamprecht AG.
A standard condom has a diameter of 52mm in comparison with the Hotshot’s 45mm. Both are the same length – 190mm.
According to a study of 13 to 20-year-olds, a quarter said that a standard condom was too large.
Hilary Pannack, of teenage pregnancy charity Straight Talking Peer Education, said: ‘We know young people are having sex and if this is what it takes to protect them, we need to go along with it.’
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Always wanted to sexually explore a twelve year old/tween? Now you can do it as safely as possible!! Glad the industry is shifting in ways to keep kids more safe.
Now this kid doesn’t have to ask Mom and Dad to drive him to CVS to pick up some Plan B for his “lucky lady” the next morning:
Now these kids can safely mess around all they want, say Bye Bye to silly ol STD’s!
Look like its gonna be a fun and well-protected night ahead…
In order to keep up with the incredible interactive nature of the Internet/computers/iPhones, furniture is now hoping to be a little more interpersonal and nurturing too.
Thank you animation/CGI/iPhones for teaching us that everything must be our “friend” and that we must share a personal bond or connection with anything, whether it has a breathing pulse or merely a touch screen.
Also, one of these featured furniture pieces seems to be a bit out of place from the other kid-huggable/interactive-able BFFurnitures… And I’m a little bothered by the idea of feeling sexually attracted to my dresser.
P.S. That grandfather clock seems to have a really bad attitude.
