#SoLongVampires.

Like always, we here at the Museum are really really excited for the Superbowl because we love football, big screen TV’s, buffalo wings, and über-expensive incredibly-mediocre tv commercials that become America’s greatest cultural references for the following week after.

So here as a sneak peak to all the Superbowl action (FFFYEAH!!!), we present to you Audi’s Superbowl commercial.  Apparently the Giants-Patriots match-up has duped Audi into thinking it’s still 2008, which in some sense, it kinda is.

Also/so the huge bonfire has no effect on the sexed up vampire 20-somethings, but LED lights are an instant killing machine?…

“This is an Artifact of Modernity” Seating Arrangement in the Superbowl VIP Section of the Day (2/6/11):

I mean, we kinda said exactly what was needed to be said.

We only wish that this was reversed, so that the Bush’s could be staring down at Ashton, and all three of them staring down at Cheese-head boy.

(Source: inothernews)

The Museum hopes you all have this interesting of a Superbowl-watching experience.

(via fashionofthechrist)

(Source: castration)

As everything in existence becomes more obscure with the rise of the Post-Irony era, it seems a fitting time to call into question even the most basic of our human identities.

Thus, we take this time to question the role and place of millions of women everywhere, a role so basic yet so complex, a lady that each and every Museum-goer originally came from… why it’s MOMS!

But what constitutes motherhood today?  What really makes a MOM??

And so we ask about the following examples, “Is this a MOM?”

Is this a Mom?  Is the Lord Almighty GaGa a baby-maker? (aka Is GaGa a MaMa?)

If so, is this baby Immaculate Conception 2.0?  Or is this just a product of a ‘bad romance’?

Does the fact that she’s carrying a baby mean she’s a MOM?  Is it hers?  Is it mine?  Is it all of ours, as a collective group of “little monsters”?  Is this a Mom?

Is this a Mom?  Or is this just a woman merely using her body’s reproductive system for the sake of celebrity pop culture status?  Is there some sort of Quantity over Quality rule when it comes to motherhood?  Is this a Mom, or just an OctoMom?

Is this a Mom?  Or is this just a ploy to use one’s goodie-two-shoes clean cut tabloid-safe daughter for the sake of promoting a political agenda?  Where might Hillary rank “bein’ a momma” if she had to make a list of roles she has played?

Is Chelsea really a daughter or a mere political product?  Is HillBot still a meme in post-2008 culture?

Is this a Mom? Or is this just an advertisement for the National Transcendentalist Movement?  Is this good parenting?  Or is this a trip to the emergency room waiting to happen (for either the baby or the laptop)?

Is Motherhood in the 2000’s merely a balancing act?  Are portable handheld phones back in fashion or a statement of 90’s-era-ensued irony?

Is this a Mom?  Does Human + Baby = Mom?  Is a Mom a person or a mere social construct?  Will this baby remember Superbowl XIV as the most epic night of his/her life?  Is this baby safe around all this falling confetti….?  This seems like a choking hazard to me… Should Mothers Against Drunk Driving refocus their effort on an anti-choking-on-confetti campaign?

Is this a Mom?  Or is it a MILF?  Is she both / can she be both?  Does being a “hockey MILF” mean that she drops her kids off to hockey practice everyday, or is her hubby a hockey player, or is she a hockey player, or does one have to be a hockey player to tap that?

Is this Porn, or just another glitter-ridden GIF image?

Is this a Mom?  Or is this just a lady who has become an advertisement for the encouragement of increased amounts of Moms?  Is her social conservative stance on pro-life really about saving the babies?  Or is this just for the sake of increasing the global Mom population?  Are Moms a dying breed that need saving?

Is this a Mom?

Are these Moms?

Is this a Mom?

Is this a Mom?  But seriously, is it?

Is this a Mom?